Phil was below-decks when the cannon shells started flying. He was knocked off his feet when one struck the hold, and, being curious as he was, he went to peer out. As he curiously examined the splintered shards of wood, the enemy sailors, too lazy to move their cannons, fired again at the exact same spot.
When the enemies had been fought off, Captain Obvious descended into the hold to survey the damage. "Phil!", he cried, and cradled Phil's head in his arms, because he couldn't find the rest of him.
"Gentlemen," he addressed the gathered sailors. "Phil here fought a valiant battle for his life, but lost. However, we must let him be remembered. How might we do this?"
"Aren't there jewels out on the side planks?" some sailor said.
"Yes," mused Captain Obvious. "Curious Phil, in his curiosity, must have gone outside to examine them! But with the bombshells on his tail, it's no wonder he exploded. At least we have his head. And now," he continued, "I declare the following- 'CURIOSITY KILLED THE CAT'!"
Ever since then, whenever a person or feline named Phil is tragically killed in a maritime explosion, mourners say "curiosity killed the cat".
Next week, we explore the origin of "shut your trap and eat your spinach".
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